[layback40]

As is tradition in Italian families, Maria spends her wedding night in her family home. Her mother sleeps in the adjacent room in case Maria has any questions. Mama tells Maria, "You have any a problem, you come and see Mama."
Later, Maria's husband unbuttons his shirt, and Maria jumps up, runs next door and cries, "Mama, Mama.. He has hair all over his chest..!"
Mama reassures Maria, "Men have hair on the chest. This is sign of a good man. Go now and make him happy."
But when Maria's husband takes off his belt, she goes jumps up again, runs next door and cries, "Mama, Mama..! He has a protrusion in his pants..!"
Mama reassures her, "He finds you beautiful. This is sign of a good man. Go now and make him happy."
Finally, Maria's husband takes off his shoes. Due to a terrible childhood accident, he only has half of his right foot. Maria jumps up and runs back to her mother's room, shouting, "Mama, Mama..! He has a foot and a half..!"
Her mother gets up and announces, "Stand back, Maria -- this is a job for your Mama!!.