 |
|
08-09-2017
|
 |
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,852 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,615
Liked 6,583 Times in 4,358 Posts
|
|
I accidentally bumped into a cross-eyed woman today...she yelled,"You need to look where you are going"!!!
"Fuck off", says I..."you need to go where you're looking"!!!
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
08-09-2017
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,852 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,615
Liked 6,583 Times in 4,358 Posts
|
|
North Korea's leader needs to explain why his barber is still alive.
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
08-09-2017
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,852 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,615
Liked 6,583 Times in 4,358 Posts
|
|
Dad, what's a transvestite? Don't ask me, ask your mother, he will know
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
08-09-2017
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,852 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,615
Liked 6,583 Times in 4,358 Posts
|
|
My girlfriend and I had sex in my car last night - was pretty uncomfortable though.
Maybe we should have dropped her parents off first?
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
08-09-2017
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,852 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,615
Liked 6,583 Times in 4,358 Posts
|
|
Q. What's the difference between parsley and pussy?
A. Nobody eats parsley.
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
08-09-2017
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,852 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,615
Liked 6,583 Times in 4,358 Posts
|
|
|
I'm sick of women saying men can't multi task!
I can tell my wife how beautiful she looks
and keep a straight face at the same time!!..
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
08-09-2017
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,852 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,615
Liked 6,583 Times in 4,358 Posts
|
|
Why can’t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s OK now.
How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A fish.
The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.
C, E flat, and G walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, no minors.”
I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people. But none of them work.
Just one actually.
How many scientists does it take to build a time machine?
Lexophilia - "Lexophile" is a word used to describe those that have a love for words, such as "you can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish," or "to write with a broken pencil is pointless.
A competition to see who can come up with the best lexophiles is held every year. This year's winning submission is posted at the very end...
When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.
The batteries were given out free of charge.
A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.
A will is a dead giveaway.
With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
A boiled egg is hard to beat.
When you've seen one shopping centre you've seen a mall.
Police were summoned to a day-care centre where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He's all right now.
A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired.
When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.
He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she'd dye.
Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it.
Those who get too big for their pants will be totally exposed in the end.
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
Last edited by layback40; 08-09-2017 at 08:15 PM.
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is On
|
|
|
|
All times are GMT +10. The time now is 06:27 AM.
|
|
|
|
Advertisements
|
|
|
