Jokes - Page 16 - AUSJEEPOFFROAD.COM Jeep News Australia and New Zealand

Go Back   AUSJEEPOFFROAD.COM Jeep News Australia and New Zealand > GENERAL > Off Topic Chitchat
Register Forums Trading Your Jeep My Garage Mark All Read

Post New Thread  Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  #106  
Old 06-12-2007
Nobody  Nobody is offline
ARB Tripper
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Sydney
Posts: 549
What Jeep do I drive?: CJ
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

Me too.....
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfe View Post
howdy blanket girl!! :)
  #107  
Old 06-12-2007
Nobody  Nobody is offline
ARB Tripper
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Sydney
Posts: 549
What Jeep do I drive?: CJ
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default School 1960 vs. School 2007

Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.

1960 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up mates.

2007 - Police are called, SWAT team arrives and arrests Johnny and Mark. Mobiles with video of fight confiscated as evidence. They are charged with assault, AVOs are taken out and both are suspended even though Johnny started it. Diversionary conferences and parent meetings conducted. Video shown on 6 internet sites.


Scenario: Jeffrey won't sit still in class, disrupts other students.

1960 - Jeffrey is sent to the principal's office and given a good paddling. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

2007 - Jeffrey is given huge doses of Ritalin. Counselled to death. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra funding because Jeffrey has a disability. Drops out of school.



Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

1960 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2007 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is removed to foster care and joins a gang. Psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mum has an affair with the psychologist. Psychologist gets a promotion.


Scenario: Mark, a college student, brings cigarettes to school .

1960 - Mark shares a smoke with the school principal out on the smoking area.


2007 - Police are called and Mark is expelled from School for drug possession. His car is searched for drugs and weapons.


Scenario: Vinh fails high school English.

1960 - Vinh goes to Remedial English, passes and goes to college.

2007 - Vinh's cause is taken up by local human rights group. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that making English a requirement for graduation is racist. Civil Liberties Association files class action lawsuit against state school system and his English teacher. English is banned from core curriculum. Vinh is given his Y10 anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.


Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers, puts them in a model plane paint bottle and blows up an anthill.

1960 - Ants die.

2007 - Security and ASIO are called and Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. Teams investigate parents, siblings are removed from the home, computers are confiscated, and Johnny's dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.


Scenario: Johnny falls during recess and scrapes his knee. His teacher, Mary, finds him crying, and gives him a hug to comfort him.

1960 - Johnny soon feels better and goes back to playing.

2007 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces three years in prison. Johnny undergoes five years of therapy. Becomes gay.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfe View Post
howdy blanket girl!! :)
  #108  
Old 06-12-2007
ZMattJ's Avatar
ZMattJ  ZMattJ is offline
Senior Newbie
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Perth - South of the river
Age: 48
Posts: 78
What Jeep do I drive?: ZJ
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by hemijeepy View Post
oh crap im stupid.........
No Worries Hemi

When I read it the first time I was an Idiot.
  #109  
Old 11-12-2007
Nudge's Avatar
Nudge  Nudge is offline
AJOR Gold
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: In a pill bottle
Posts: 1,059
What Jeep do I drive?: TJ
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

http://users.telenet.be/leukelinks/flash/kitten.htm
__________________




  #110  
Old 12-12-2007
Bomber's Avatar
Bomber  Bomber is offline
Jeepin' is incurable....
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Melbourne, and anywhere else my Jeeps can take me
Posts: 1,781
What Jeep do I drive?: WK2
Likes: 27
Liked 69 Times in 55 Posts
Default

Hey that could be almost as addictive as elf bowl!
__________________
WK2 2013 Trailhawk
VJ2 4-63 1948 Jeepster
MJOC
  #111  
Old 12-12-2007
Barefoot's Avatar
Barefoot  Barefoot is offline
The Chook Whisperer
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Viva MossVegas
Posts: 4,436
What Jeep do I drive?: JT
Likes: 8
Liked 3 Times in 2 Posts
Default

What kind of bees make milk?














Boobies.





__________________
  #112  
Old 12-12-2007
jjjgw  jjjgw is offline
Senior Newbie
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 59
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

You are riding a horse, on the right hand side of you is a cliff, on the left is an elephant, you are chasing a kangaroo and right behind you is a lion chasing you.

How do you get out of this predicament with you life????
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Get off the merry go round - your pissed again!
Post New Thread  Reply



Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On





All times are GMT +10. The time now is 04:03 PM.


Advertisements




AJOR does not vouch for or warrant the accuracy, completeness or usefulness of any message, and are not responsible for the contents of any message. The messages express the views of the author of the message, not necessarily the views of AJOR or any entity associated with AJOR, nor should any advice be substituted as technical advice replacing that of a mechanic. You agree, through your use of this service, that you will not use AJOR to post any material which is knowingly false and/or defamatory, inaccurate, abusive, vulgar, hateful, harassing, obscene, profane, sexually oriented, threatening, invasive of a person's privacy, religious, political or otherwise violative of any law. You agree not to post any copyrighted material unless the copyright is owned by you or by AJOR. The owner, administrators and moderators of AJOR reserve the right to delete any message or members for any or no reason whatsoever. You remain solely responsible for the content of your messages, and you agree to indemnify and hold harmless AJOR, the administrators, moderators, and their agents with respect to any claim based upon transmission of your message(s). The use of profile signatures to intentionally mislead or misdirect any member on this forum is not acceptable and may result in your account being suspended. Any trip that is organised through the AJOR forum is participated at your own risk. If you or your vehicle is damaged it is your responsibility, not that of the person that posted the thread, message or topic initiating the trip, nor the organisers of AJOR or moderators of any specific forum. This forum and associated website is the property of AJOR. No user data is harvested and no information supplied in your registration will be sold for profit.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

AJOR © 2002 - 2024 AUSJEEPOFFROAD.COM. All corporate trademarked names and logos are property of their respective owners. Ausjeepoffroad is in no way associated with DaimlerChrysler Corporation or Fiat Jeep.
www.ausjeep.com www.ausjeep.com.au www.midlifemate.com ausjeepforum.com www.r9kustoms.com
vB Ad Management by =RedTyger=