How tuff are Aussie blokes?

[BLU-125]

21.......means I'm old.

[bruggz351]

WOW... I'm "true blue"... 20

[layback40]

Originally Posted by bruggz351

I'm really quite astounded the thread made it this far...

Feel free every body, post it if ya got it..

You've made an awesome contribution layback ya got some good stuff there man...

hey bruggz,
I feel like I have hijacked your thread a bit.
You dont appear to mind as you can close it any time you like.
just hope that it all puts a few smiles on every ones face !
The quiz is about as Ozz as you can get.
Lets see if it can make 10,000 views !!

[bruggz351]

HA HA.. It's all good layback...

I'm enjoyin this...

10 000, and beyond.

[layback40]

The 60's
It was a hot Saturday evening in the summer of 1960 and Fred had a date with Peggy Sue.
He arrived at her house and rang the bell.
'Oh, come on in!' Peggy Sue's mother said as she welcomed Fred in. 'Have a seat in the living room. Would you like something to drink? Lemonade? Iced tea?'
'Iced tea, please,' Fred said. Mom brought the iced tea.
'So, what are you and Peggy planning to do tonight?' she asked.
'Oh, probably catch a movie, then maybe grab a bite to eat at the malt shop,
maybe take a walk on the beach...'
'Peggy likes to screw, you know,' Mom informed him.
'Really?' Fred asked, eyebrows rose.
'Oh yes,' the mother continued. 'When she goes out with her friends, that's all they do!'
'Is that so?' asked Fred, incredulous.
'Yes,' said the mother. 'As a matter of fact, she'd screw all night if we let her!'
'Well, thanks for the tip!' Fred said as he began thinking about alternate plans for the evening.
A moment later, Peggy Sue came down the stairs looking pretty as a picture wearing a pink blouse and a hoop skirt, and with her hair tied back in a
bouncy ponytail. She greeted Fred.
'Have fun, kids!' the mother said as they left.
Half an hour later, a completely dishevelled Peggy Sue burst into the house and slammed the front door behind her.
'Twist, Mom!' she angrily yelled to her mother in the kitchen. 'The Twist, Dammit! It's called the Twist! '

[layback40]

The Pilot
Once upon a time, a pilot asked a beautiful princess, "Will you marry me?"
The princess said, "No!"
And the pilot lived happily ever after and flew jets all over the world and drove hot cars and chased skinny, long-legged, big-breasted flight attendants and hunted and fished and went to topless bars and dated women half his age and drank Whiskey and Captain Morgan and never heard bitching and never paid child support or alimony and kept his house and guns and ate cold leftover crew meals, potato chips and beans and blew enormous farts and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was frickin' cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up........ The end.

[layback40]

It is probably only Australians who can write poetry about Australian icons that can be understood by Australians.

If you have a good memory, lived on a farm or are used to camping you will know what I mean when you read today’s Aussie Classic Poem.
Just scroll down ......


Goodbye Granddad

Poor old Granddad's passed away, cut off in his prime,
He never had a day off crook - gone before his time,
We found him in the dunny, collapsed there on the seat,
A startled look upon his face, his trousers around his feet,

The doctor said his heart was good - fit as any trout,
The Constable he had his say, 'foul play' was not ruled out.
There were theories at the inquest of snakebite without a trace,
Of redbacks quietly creeping and death from outer space,
No-one had a clue at all - the judge was in some doubt,
When Dad was called to have his say as to how it came about,
'I reckon I can clear it up,' said Dad with trembling breath,
'You see it's quite a story - but it could explain his death.'
'This here exploration mob had been looking at our soil,
And they reckoned that our farm was just the place for oil,
So they came and put a bore down and said they'd make some trials,
They drilled a hole as deep as hell, they said about three miles.
Well, they never found a trace of oil and off they went, post haste,
And I couldn't see a hole like that go to flamin' waste,
So I moved the dunny over it - real smart move I thought,
I'd never have to dig again - I'd never be 'caught short'.
The day I moved the dunny, it looked a proper sight,
But I didn't dream poor Granddad would pass away that night,
Now I reckon what has happened - poor Granddad didn't know,
The dunny was re-located when that night he had to go.
And you'll probably be wondering how poor Granddad did his dash--
Well, he always used to hold his breath
Until he heard the splash!!