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11-06-2015
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Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,820 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,601
Liked 6,569 Times in 4,351 Posts
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My wife asked me how I could love her and still enjoy watching porn.
I told her, I love my car but I still watch Formula 1 too.
She was happy with this analogy - I just never mentioned I also go to Hertz for the occasional rental.
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
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11-06-2015
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Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,820 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,601
Liked 6,569 Times in 4,351 Posts
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This bloke in the pub said to me,
"F@r2k me, that was a rough old bitch you were with last night, not a patch on the women I normally see you with, what on Earth ever possessed to take her out? "
"I had to, " I replied, "it was our wedding anniversary. "...
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
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11-06-2015
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Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,820 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,601
Liked 6,569 Times in 4,351 Posts
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Wife asked her husband for ten grand to get a gastric band fitted.He said "Here's a fiver, get a f@rkin padlock for the fridge".
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
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11-06-2015
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DetroitDemon
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Casino
Posts: 4,801 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 5,510
Liked 1,325 Times in 717 Posts
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Quote:
Originally Posted by layback40
Doc," I said, "every time I fart the room fills with smoke and stinks of petrol. What's the matter with me?"
"That's easy," he said. "You're exhausted."
Sounds like Bruggz trying to start his XJ  [emoji38]  |
HEY! I resemble that remark. 😝
Sent from my FRED
__________________
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11-06-2015
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Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,820 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,601
Liked 6,569 Times in 4,351 Posts
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Anna realized that she had grown hair between her legs. She got worried and asked her mom about that hair.
Her mom calmly said: "That part where the hair has grown is called Monkey, be proud that your monkey has grown hair." the girl smiled. At dinner, she told her sister: "My monkey has grown hair." Her sister smiled and said: "That’s nothing, mine is already eating bananas."
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
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11-06-2015
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Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,820 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,601
Liked 6,569 Times in 4,351 Posts
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I was sitting on a bus behind a mother and her young son. Her boy kept looking around and pulling funny faces at me.
After a few minutes, I tired of his antics, so I said, "When I was young, my mother told me that if I made an ugly face and the wind changed, I'd stay that way." The little shit replied, "Well, you can't say you weren't f@rking warned."
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
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11-06-2015
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Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,820 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,601
Liked 6,569 Times in 4,351 Posts
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Cat falls into a puddle,the rooster begins to laugh.
The cat asks."What the hell are you laughing at?"
The rooster replied,"A wet pussy always makes a cock happy!".
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
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