How tuff are Aussie blokes?

[layback40]

Bluey went to a psychiatrist.
"Doc," he said, "I've got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there's somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under ... you gotta help me, I'm going crazy!"

"Just put yourself in my hands for two years," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears."

"How much do you charge?"

"A hundred dollars per visit."

"I'll sleep on it," said Bluey

Six months later the doctor met Bluey on the street.

"Why didn't you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist.

"For a hundred buck's a visit? A bartender cured me for ten dollars."

"Is that so! How?"

"He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"

[dom83]

Originally Posted by admissionbangalore

thank you so much for your help i really appreciate it.......................

























































































































































BMS College of Engineering Admission

BMS Institute of Technology Admission

CMR Institute of Technology Admission

PES Institute of Technology Admission

PES School of Engineering Admission

Reva Institute of Technology and Management Admission

RV College of Engineering Admission

Dayananda Sagar College of Engineering Admission

MS Ramaiah Institute of Technology Admission

This is a good one!!!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Clarky]

Originally Posted by admissionbangalore

thank you so much for your help i really appreciate it.......................

Now piss off

[dom83]

Originally Posted by Clarky

Now piss off

Nice work


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[layback40]

An old man was on the beach and walked up to a beautiful girl in a bikini.
"I want to feel your breasts," he exclaimed.
"Get away from me, you crazy old man," she replied.
"I want to feel your breasts, I will give you twenty pounds" he says.
"Twenty pounds? Are you mad!? Get away from me!"
"I want to feel your breasts. I will give you one hundred pounds" he says.
"No! Get away from me."
"TWO HUNDRED POUNDS" he says. She pauses to think about it, but then comes to her senses and says, "I said No!"
"FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS" if you let me feel your breasts," he pleads.
She thinks, well, he is old, and he seems harmless enough.. and five hundred pounds is a lot of money.... "Well, OK.. but only for a minute," she says.
She loosens her bikini top and while both are standing there on the beach, he slides his hands underneath and begins to feel... and then he starts saying, "OH MY GOD.. OH MY GOD.. OH MY GOD.." while he is caressing them.
So out of curiosity, she asks him, "Why do you keep saying 'Oh my god, oh my god'?" While continuing to feel her breasts he answers, "OH MY GOD.. OH MY GOD.. OH MY GOD.. where am I going to get five hundred pounds from".😜

[layback40]

It takes 24 hours for the body to turn food into shit....It takes mcdonalds 10 mins.😂

[layback40]

I went to a mate's wedding and
I whispered to a bloke next to me "isn't the bride a right ugly bastard".
"Do you mind? That's my daughter you're talking about"
"I'm really sorry, I didn't know you were her father"
"I'm not. I'm her mother you cheeky ******** !!!