 |
|
19-11-2015
|
 |
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,811 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,597
Liked 6,565 Times in 4,348 Posts
|
|
A duck walks into a bar. "Have you got any bread?", The duck asks the barman. ..."No."he replies. The duck asks again, "got any bread?"
"No!" Replies the barman getting a little irate. The duck asks yet again "got any bread?. The barman shouts "IF YOU ASK ME IF IVE GOT ANY BREAD ONE MORE ********ING TIME, I WILL NAIL YOUR BLEEDING BEAK TO THIS BAR!!!"
The duck looks at the barman and asks "got any nails?"....exasperated the barman replies "NO!!"
"Got any bread then......" asks the duck.
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
19-11-2015
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,811 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,597
Liked 6,565 Times in 4,348 Posts
|
|
What a ******** of a week it's been for the world. Terrorist attacks in Paris, Earthquakes in Japan, Mexico and now Greece, Bombings in Beirut and Baghdad...
It seems the only positive thing on my Newsfeed at the moment, is Charlie Sheen.
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
19-11-2015
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,811 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,597
Liked 6,565 Times in 4,348 Posts
|
|
A 35 year old Pakistani man from Slough has been arrested for punching his wife in the face.
Chinda Goodunpropa denies the charge.
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
19-11-2015
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,811 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,597
Liked 6,565 Times in 4,348 Posts
|
|
A policeman searched me in a public toilet last night and found a small bag of class A drugs.
"It's not my fault," I said, "Every time I try flushing them down the toilet they magically appear back in my pocket again."
"Do you really expect me to believe that?" he laughed.
I said, "I'll prove it to you if you want me to!"
"Go on then." he smiled, handing me the bag.
After flushing them, he looked at me and said, "Well, show me your pocket then."
"What for?" I asked.
He said, "The drugs."
I said, "What drugs?
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
19-11-2015
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,811 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,597
Liked 6,565 Times in 4,348 Posts
|
|
A billionaire was having a party at his house, and in his back yard he had a huge pool with great white sharks in it.
He announced to everyone at the party that whoever could swim across the pool without getting attacked could either have all his money, his wife, or his house.
So when everyone got back to talking all of a sudden a guy is in the pool swimming as fast as he can and when he gets to the other side and jumps out.
The billionaire goes.. "Holy shit, I didn’t think anyone was going to do it, but anyway, you want the money right?" and the guy says "no",
So the billionaire says, "oh, you want my house?" and the guys says "no" and so the billionaire says," what, you want my wife, then?"
But the guys says "hell no"
So the billionaire says "well what the f@rk do you want?"
The guy's still trying to catch his breath says, " I want the motherf*cker who pushed me in the pool”
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
20-11-2015
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,811 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,597
Liked 6,565 Times in 4,348 Posts
|
|
|
Essex girl in car crash says "i think i have concussion" paramedic asks "how many fingers have i got up?" the girl replies "oh god, my fanny's paralysed too!"
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
20-11-2015
|
|
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,811 What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,597
Liked 6,565 Times in 4,348 Posts
|
|
Paddy on death row gets the choice to be shot, hung or injected with the aids virus. He says 'Give me that aids stuff'. They inject him and he starts rolling around the floor laughing. The warden asks 'what's so funny Paddy' to which Paddy replies 'I'm wearing a condom'
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is On
|
|
|
|
All times are GMT +10. The time now is 05:23 PM.
|
|
|
|
Advertisements
|
|
|
