How tuff are Aussie blokes? - Page 983 - AUSJEEPOFFROAD.COM Jeep News Australia and New Zealand

Go Back   AUSJEEPOFFROAD.COM Jeep News Australia and New Zealand > GENERAL > Off Topic Chitchat
Register Forums Trading Your Jeep New Garage Mark All Read

Post New Thread  Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  #6875  
Old 12-10-2016
layback40's Avatar
layback40  layback40 is offline
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,779
What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,578
Liked 6,546 Times in 4,340 Posts
Default

This is how bad immigration is getting.

I walked into my local corner shop wondering if I could pay by my card and all I said was "Visa?"

The fucking ******** ran off!..
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
Likes: (1)
  #6876  
Old 12-10-2016
layback40's Avatar
layback40  layback40 is offline
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,779
What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,578
Liked 6,546 Times in 4,340 Posts
Default

We didn’t have this green thing back in my days
Checking out at Wal-Mart, the young cashier suggested to the older woman that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren’t good for the environment.
The woman apologized and explained, “We didn’t have this green thing back in my earlier days.”
The assistant responded, “That’s our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment for future generations.”She was right — our generation didn’t have the green thing in its day.Back then, we returned milk bottles, soft drink bottles and beer bottles to the shop.
The shop sent them back to the plant to be washed, sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were recycled.
But we didn’t have the green thing back in our day.We walked up stairs because we didn’t have an elevator or escalator in every store and office building.
We walked to the grocers and didn’t climb into a 200-horsepower machine every time we had to go two blocks. But she was right. We didn’t have the green thing in our day.
Back then, we washed the baby’s diapers because we didn’t have the throw-away kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy gobbling machine burning up 2000 watts — wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back then.
Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing.
But that young lady is right. We didn’t have the green thing back in our day.Back then, we had one TV or radio in the house — not a TV in every room. And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief not a screen the size of Texas.
In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn’t have electric machines to do everything for us.
When we packaged a fragile item to send in the post, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap.
Back then, we didn’t fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power.
We exercised by working so we didn’t need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity.
But she’s right. We didn’t have the green thing back then.When we were thirsty we drank from a tap instead of drinking from a plastic bottle of water shipped from the other side of the world.
We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced the blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor when the blade got dull.
But we didn’t have the green thing back then.Back then, people took the bus and kids rode their bikes to school or walked instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service.
We had one electrical socket in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances.
And we didn’t need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 2,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest fish and chip shop.
But isn’t it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn’t have the green thing back then?
Please forward this on to another selfish, grumpy old git who needs a lesson in conservation from a smarta*se young person.
Remember: Don’t make old people angry. We don’t like being old in the first place, so it doesn’t take much to piss us off!!
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
Likes: (2)
  #6877  
Old 13-10-2016
layback40's Avatar
layback40  layback40 is offline
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,779
What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,578
Liked 6,546 Times in 4,340 Posts
Default

A gynecologist notices that a new patient is nervous.

While putting on the latex gloves, he asks her if she knows how they make latex gloves.

The patient replies with a simple “No.”

The doctor says, “There is a plant in Mexico full of latex that people of various hand sizes dip their hands into and let them dry.”

She doesn’t even crack a smile, but several minutes later she laughs.

The doctor says, “What’s so funny?”

She says, “I’m imagining how they make condoms!”
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
Likes: (1)
  #6878  
Old 13-10-2016
layback40's Avatar
layback40  layback40 is offline
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,779
What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,578
Liked 6,546 Times in 4,340 Posts
Default

I saw these two blind guys about to fight and I shouted, "My money's on the one with the knife." You should have seen how fast they both ran off..
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
Likes: (3)
  #6879  
Old 13-10-2016
layback40's Avatar
layback40  layback40 is offline
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,779
What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,578
Liked 6,546 Times in 4,340 Posts
Default

Jehovah's Witnesses don't celebrate Halloween. I guess they don't like random people knocking on their fucking doors.
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
Likes: (2)
  #6880  
Old 13-10-2016
layback40's Avatar
layback40  layback40 is offline
Grumpy Old XJ Dsl Owner
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Northern Victoria
Posts: 13,779
What Jeep do I drive?: XJ
Likes: 4,578
Liked 6,546 Times in 4,340 Posts
Default

I've just been offered a great deal from Vodafone.
A Samsung Galaxy Note 7 and a free fire extinguisher..
__________________
98&01XJVMs,06&07KJCRD's,No longer question authority,I annoy it.More effect,less effort.10000Club
Likes: (2)
  #6881  
Old 13-10-2016
SteveT  SteveT is offline
Full Flexer
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Sydney N.S.W.
Posts: 641
Likes: 15
Liked 29 Times in 14 Posts
Default

Attached Thumbnails
Click image for larger version

Name:	IMG_0514.JPG
Views:	151
Size:	102.4 KB
ID:	74796  
Likes: (5)

Last edited by SteveT; 13-10-2016 at 09:16 PM.
Post New Thread  Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On





All times are GMT +10. The time now is 07:31 PM.


Advertisements




AJOR does not vouch for or warrant the accuracy, completeness or usefulness of any message, and are not responsible for the contents of any message. The messages express the views of the author of the message, not necessarily the views of AJOR or any entity associated with AJOR, nor should any advice be substituted as technical advice replacing that of a mechanic. You agree, through your use of this service, that you will not use AJOR to post any material which is knowingly false and/or defamatory, inaccurate, abusive, vulgar, hateful, harassing, obscene, profane, sexually oriented, threatening, invasive of a person's privacy, religious, political or otherwise violative of any law. You agree not to post any copyrighted material unless the copyright is owned by you or by AJOR. The owner, administrators and moderators of AJOR reserve the right to delete any message or members for any or no reason whatsoever. You remain solely responsible for the content of your messages, and you agree to indemnify and hold harmless AJOR, the administrators, moderators, and their agents with respect to any claim based upon transmission of your message(s). The use of profile signatures to intentionally mislead or misdirect any member on this forum is not acceptable and may result in your account being suspended. Any trip that is organised through the AJOR forum is participated at your own risk. If you or your vehicle is damaged it is your responsibility, not that of the person that posted the thread, message or topic initiating the trip, nor the organisers of AJOR or moderators of any specific forum. This forum and associated website is the property of AJOR. No user data is harvested and no information supplied in your registration will be sold for profit.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

AJOR © 2002 - 2024 AUSJEEPOFFROAD.COM. All corporate trademarked names and logos are property of their respective owners. Ausjeepoffroad is in no way associated with DaimlerChrysler Corporation or Fiat Jeep.
www.ausjeep.com www.ausjeep.com.au www.midlifemate.com ausjeepforum.com www.r9kustoms.com
vB Ad Management by =RedTyger=